


Pain ( And All The Ways It Loves Us)

by Rayrawl



Category: Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Although definitely not team cap anyway, Chronic Illness, Chronic Pain, Clint is okay though, F/M, He didn't retire but also isn't a little bitch, Howard Stark's A+ Parenting, Jane can be a bad friend, Not Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Compliant, Not Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Compliant, Not Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Compliant, Not Steve Rogers Friendly, Not Thor: Ragnarok (2017) Compliant, Protective Jarvis (Iron Man movies), Secrets, Spoon Theory, Team Cap Critical, The Bots, Tony Fixes things, Tony Stark Has A Heart, and care more about the science, but not everything can be fixed, but she loves Darcy and is very sorry, no wanda, so he just loves them instead, spoonies, supporting people through their shit
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-31
Updated: 2020-11-25
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:01:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,903
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25637716
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rayrawl/pseuds/Rayrawl
Summary: It starts because Tony Stark can keep his nose out of absolutely nothing. Especially under his own roof. Thats how she found herself here, curled up crying in front of a doctor.Except maybe thats not where it starts at all.Maybe it started with Jane, and Thor. New Mexico and London. The adventure of a lifetime that drains and exhilerates her in almost equal measure.Or maybe it starts when she leaves home to go to college with hardly a goodbye to her parents.Or when she's fifteen and they tell her to stop faking it.Or when she's twelve and she faints for the first time, in a horrible display of flailing limbs and cracked heads, down a flight of stairs.Wherever it started, however she got here.Goddamn, Darcy is grateful as all hell.
Relationships: Darcy Lewis/Tony Stark, Jane Foster/Thor
Comments: 52
Kudos: 324





	1. London

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, fair friends. This is my first foray into this fandom, and my first time writing in years. So, currently accepting constructive comments but will probably cry if you're mean. 
> 
> A lot of what Darcy will go through in this is based on my own issues with Chronic Illness, and especially Invisible Chronic Illness. It does not convey how everyone with this or these illnesses will present or feel.

_It starts because Tony Stark can keep his nose out of absolutely nothing. Especially under his own roof. Thats how she found herself here, curled up crying in front of a doctor._

_Except maybe thats not where it starts at all. Maybe it started with Jane, and Thor. New Mexico and London. The adventure of a lifetime that drains and exhilerates her in almost equal measure._

_Or maybe it starts when she leaves home to go to college with hardly a goodbye to her parents._

_Or when she's fifteen and they tell her to stop faking it._

_Or when she's twelve and she faints for the first time, in a horrible display of flailing limbs and cracked heads, down a flight of stairs. Wherever it started, however she got here._

_Goddamn, Darcy is grateful as all hell._

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

With London done with, Shield tiding up the mess as Thor throws his weight around and Ian cowers from Darcy and her ridiculously impulsive kissing, Darcy takes a second to breathe. Fuck, fuck that had been close. Maybe she should have gotten out after New Mexico, should have waved goodbye to Jane once she got her science credits legitimised and then completely forgotten how piss-your-pants terrifying it was when aliens intent on killing Earth came out of the sky. She could have gotten a nice post-graduate internship with a low-level politician. Maybe called her parents and finally ask for all those 'dressing to impress in DC' hints her mom had been trying to foist onto her since Darcy declared her major. She would have watched all this on the news and vaguely recalled how terribly afraid she had been, getting the puppies out of the line of fire in New Mexico, but she would have been safe and all the terror would be on the television and across the ocean. Maybe she would finally have health insurance that could cover the things she actually needs, and she would be able to figure out what the hell was wrong with her without her parents angry-sad-disappointing looks haunting her.

That is, of course, if she hadn't developed a truly terrible attraction to the adrenaline and the comradeship, to late night 'Science! binges' with Jane. To bitching about Thor disappearing into the sky while begging Hiemdall to send him back. If she hadn't taken to caring for Erik like a slightly deranged uncle, and feeding Jane half grapes like a small child while she was distracted. If she hadn't fallen in love with loving them, and being loved in return. Finally knowing what it was like to be respected for who she was and not what someone thought she ought to be. She never really believed she could leave, not after. Not with the people she adored still out there doing all this. Darcy couldn't have watched all this happen on the screen without being crushed by the guilt of leaving them behind. So instead, she takes her breather and downs a liquid IV in a bottle of water, tries to calm the vicious pounding of her heart in her chest that gallops as she moves from laying to sitting to standing. Contemplates the dizzy-dizzy-dizzy that plagues her as her feet settle onto the ground to figure out whether what happened last time will happen again, and finally powers on to bully Thor into letting her take pictures of him for her Facebook.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tony freaking Stark swoops in two days later. Clean up almost finished, Shield gone with all the important things, Thor and Jane finally getting a chance to 'catch up with each other', and so Darcy is alone watching bad British late night TV when Iron Man himself buzzes past the window of their apartment. There's a knock on their door a minute later, clunky with the heavy hand of metal encasing his fist, and Darcy scrambles to get up and going without braining herself on the table or spilling popcorn down her bra. This is not how she ever imagined meeting one of the most famous people on the planet.

" _Jane,_ " Darcy hisses as she swiftly shuffles past the bedroom door towards where Tony Stark is still obnoxiously knocking, " _Thor_ , dude I need at least one of you dressed and out here with me right now because Iron Man aka Tony freaking Stark is knocking at our door!" She listens for a second for the tell-tale scrambling of someone in the room pulling on clothes before she gets it together enough to go and answer the door. Iron Man's knocking has gotten louder and more insistent the longer she is taking, and the neighbours are about to be really pissed at her. She reaches for the handle quickly, yanking the door open just as his fist is about to connect again, and glares straight at his smug face.

"Dude, what the fuck are you doing breaking down our door at two in the goddamn morning?!" Darcy whisper-screeches as she swings the door open wider. Stark grins unrepentant, encased neck to toe in his brilliantly shiny armour as he glances her from the fluffy socks on her feet, up to the ratty sleep shorts and too big shirt, lingering a second longer than he should on the girls, before finally looking her in the face. His grin turns slightly salacious, and she is absolutely aware that Tony Stark is about to say something completely inappropriate while Darcy looks her absolute worst. Shes about to shut him down, maybe just slam the door in his face until Thor gets his pants on, but he's already behind her.

"Shieldbrother, Tony Stark! The hour is odd but I am pleased to see you."

Darcy backs away, manoeuvres around Thor's massive bulk and skims her way along the wall with a wide eye-shocked look at Jane, stood in the doorway to her bedroom. Grateful for the reprieve, although still heartily weirded out about Iron Man at their door, she leaves the boys grasping wrists and grinning at each other. Finally, turning her back on them and taking a step back towards the sofa she had been safely ensconced upon before.

She has only second of disorientating vertigo before the world goes black.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"-Arcy? Darcy? Your girls heart rate is insane right now, she on drugs or something?" There's fingers against her neck, against her wrist, brushing lightly over her head and along her neck. Her body is pressed side-length along the floor and the crowded, embarrassed feeling she can feel clenching in her stomach let her know whats happened. The slight light sneaking in along the edge of her clenched eyes make her head throb, and Darcy knows that sitting up is going to freaking suck. But someone is talking about calling an ambulance and that cannot happen, no sir, not again. So she shoves her eyes wide open, blinks desperately against the flowing, throbbing, agonising migraine brewing, and reaches out to grab whoever it is running gentle fingers along her hairline.

"No ambulance." She grumbles around a tongue too thick for her mouth. Darcy grimaces, swallows once and grips the wrist in her hand harder.

The body attached to the wrist moves, shifts until she can see a muscled forearm before.. Fuck, she has Tony Stark grabbed by the wrist. The suit has retracted, leaving him in a frankly indecent under-suit that does, wow, wonders for his everything. The face though, looks super concerned.

"No ambulance, this 'ppens, m'fine. Bed, sleep, _please_." Darcy closes her eyes against the sudden influx of faces above her, Thor and Jane joining Tony's concern, and then just starts trying to sit up by herself. No point laying on the floor like this when her bed is like, fifteen steps away. Hands grasp, sway and prod and move until she shakes them off. Until Jane's hand is the only one on her, and Darcy knows she's shooed the men away, and they're moving towards Darcy's bed with slow, dizzy steps. Jane leaves the lights off along their way, guides Darcy into bed with a gentle whisper of a hand over her head. Finally, finally alone, Darcy lets the shame and embarrassment roll over her like emotional nausea. Their voices pick up outside her room, much like her parents used to before they stopped tucking her in when she was sick.

She tries to focus, listen to what they're saying, but the exhaustion clouds her before she can focus, and she's gone away in a wave of sleep.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Someone has left her a large glass of water on the bedside table, and her mobile phone is plugged in to the outlet just behind the bed. Darcy shuffles carefully upwards, reaches for the water and downs half of it in one go. Something in her chest flutters and skips for a second before evening out and Darcy sighs, because its going to be a bad day. She sits up slowly, moves until she has her feet against the floor and stands up slowly. Blinks the black spots away from her vision and takes stock of her body. No injuries from last nights fall, but her head still aches deeply and her vision is a little blurry around the edges. Not the worst she's ever been, but not the best either.

The embarrassment of what happened being viewed by both Thor and Tony Stark, however, might be what truly takes her out. Darcy contemplates climbing back into bed and hiding for the day, try and squash the feelings down deep and emerge later with a clearer head and steadier legs, but decides with a sigh that it would be better to just get this over with. Slowly, Darcy makes her way to the door and cracks it open an inch to listen for anyone in the main rooms. Hearing very little, she creeps out to the kitchen, intent on getting some life-giving coffee and another glass of water. She's halfway through the water when Thor breezes in, quiet for a man so large, and grins happily at the sight of her. Impossible to resist, Darcy grins back as best she can, and leans against him as he circles around to hug her solidly against his chest.

"Are you well, Lady Darcy?" Thor inquires, voice rumbling comforting and soft. "Is it the same thing that ailed you after our last battle together? The..ah, anxiety?" Darcy nods against him, snuggles as Thor hums and sways them a little, and is contemplating going back to sleep right here against him when Jane comes barging out of the office with a grin on her face.

"Pepper Potts just emailed me! He wasn't lying, they're offering us funding and housing in New York, away from Shield and with the ability to actually finally publish my findings!" Jane scuttles and dances her way around as Thor laughs and Darcy stares, open mouthed.

"What are you both waiting for?" Jane exclaims, once her excited wiggle across the living room is done. "We need to start packing!" Well, shit, Darcy thought as Thor dis-tangled himself to swoop Jane off her feet in joy. At least this time there would be steady housing and more than one superhero involved when the crazy came down on them again. So Darcy downed her too hot coffee, and found her way to join the amazed gushing over the contract in the living room.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


	2. Leaving

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! I know it has been a while so thank you all for sticking with me for this.

Darcy got swept away in the rush of packing up their life in London. Her head pounded in beat with her frantic rushing heart, but there was no time to worry about it. Jane wanted them out of London, away from the nightmare and destruction of the recent invasion, and into New York by next week. Personal items packed up quickly, lab equipment carefully wrapped and stored, all ready to travel with them just in case. The way Jane talked about it, Tony Stark could definitely be trusted for a job and a place to live, but not with the moving of her precious science toys, held together with duct-tape and desperation. Darcy was still a little preoccupied and starstruck, never mind embarrassed over her episode in front of him, to worry too much about how Jane thought Tony Freaking Stark couldn't be trusted with all her precious Science! stuff.

  
She spent the first day, after excitedly gossiping with Jane as Thor looked on them fondly, trying to keep her feet steady on the ground and herself upright. Packing up her own little space had been relatively easy, taking long breaks laid on the ground with her legs up against a wall to try and quell the bright-nausea-hurt of an episode aftermath. Always a cool glass of water and an electrolyte drink close by. Outside the safe enclosure of her room, Darcy could hear Jane's feminine laughter mixing with Thor's deep voice and hearty chuckles, a joyous cacophony of sounds she had truly missed in Thor's absence. It didn't make her feel much better in herself, but their happiness was infectious. 

  
By the time she had most of her stuff packed away into her ratty old backpack and a few boxes,except a few days worth of clothes and medications, her headache had almost cleared up. The fatigue that had plagued her since the morning was finally rolling down into the pleasant exhaustion of a day productively spent. 

The few days after that were not nearly so joyful. Jane Dy Jekyll/Mr. Hyde-d them into carefully packing up her delicate machinery, every single piece that Darcy had gotten used to in New Mexico had traveled with them to London and was veering into almost unrecognizable around their various random household items holding them together. Darcy and Thor spent many an alarming moment those few days glancing at each other wide-eyed and slightly terrified as Jane directed them into an organization system that would only ever make sense to her, trying not to get yelled at for not putting a fifth protective wrapping on the cobbled-together harmonic oscillator. 

  
Without Ian the work went slower than any of them would have liked, but him bouncing and fleeing the scene of the attack was actually working out quite well for Darcy. At least she wouldn't be forced to have the 'it was the heat of the moment and you were the nearest non-alien warm body to smooch' talk with him. She had done the exact same thing to one of Agent Coulson's jackbooted thugs in New Mexico, but for the first time ever she had been grateful for an unexpected detour to the land of unconsciousness because he'd been long gone by the time she was together enough to worry about it.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Darcy rolled into bed on the third day of frantic packing and just tried to breathe. Tears gathered in the corner of her eyes and she blinked to let them slide, just a couple, but enough that some of the emotional wave tide building up felt safely released. It had only been five days since they had all nearly died in the attack, but it felt like nearly a lifetime ago in light of all the sudden activity. There had been no real time to process, to take a second and be extra thankful that everyone she loved had survived even if it was with a few more physical and psychological wounds. She didn't really have the time to worry about it now either, as sleep tried to drag her under despite her body trying to cry out all her worries. Blinking valiantly, Darcy considered the benefits of a shower before bed and then promptly discarded them as just one effort too far today. Instead, Darcy wiped the wetness from her eyes and burritoed into the warm blankets with a heavy sigh. She was going to miss this bed, a solid improvement over their New Mexico accommodations, but was surprised to feel a sense of pleased anticipation at moving to the big city and seeing what Stark Tower truly had to offer. 

  
Moving was quite possibly the lowest on the list of Darcy's favorite things to do, not since she had left for college in an impatient and slightly traumatic attempt to escape her parents and figure things out for herself. Moving to intern with Jane had been an exercise in forcing herself to live her best life, get what she needed to graduate, and prove her parents wrong. London had been in a haze of grief over Thor's lack of presence on Earth, and the loss of what she had once thought to be a pretty simple life. All the while supporting Jane's emotional and work needs. Almost certain that her best friend-slash-boss wouldn't' take care of herself the way Darcy knew she needed. This move, however, with the promise of not having to leave again soon and having a bed and space to make her own. That had her excited. In her mind she could picture it, having the special keepsakes she had left with a friend at college shipped over, using her grandmother's thick woolen handmade throw over her sofa and cooking in the kitchen using the recipe cards she had saved over the years. The emotional tidal wave that had threatened to overtake her receeded a little more at the hope of what she was about to have. If only the stress of packing could be done sooner, and she could finally settle for a little while at least. 

  
With a sigh, Darcy wrapped herself tighter in her roll of warm blankets to ward off the cool British night. Sleep washed over her gently and in her sleepy haze, Darcy was grateful that at least for this one night she could avoid the endless drag of insomnia. 

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_Her parents appeared, stern and uncompromising, in the doorway of their little suburban home. Her mother's bottle-blonde hair twisted tight and still against the back of her scalp, leaving her face a wash of harsh lines and unhappiness. Piercing blue eyes glared at her, disappointed and cold. In comparison her father was dark and strong, hands clenched by his sides as he watched Darcy struggle to slide a box into the boot of her beat-up old car._

  
_"You can't even look after yourself here, at home, where at least you have us to support your endless list of needs. Darcy, you simply cannot just up and leave for college." Mom's voice was prim and proper, a fallacy she had convinced herself was real as she raised in the ranks of their local law firm. Dad let a sneer twist his mouth from the soft love she had seen when she was young and health into the judgemental discontent it had grown to as she had aged into someone unwell and needy._

  
_"Your mother is right. There will be no one at this school to drive you around or supply you with all the things you believe essential to your wellbeing. No one to pay for the endless parade of unnecessary doctor appointments. No more family health insurance. Stay here, Darcy. Get a job in town where people already knew who you are and what you're like." Martin Lewis cut an imposing figure, tall where she and her mother were short. Dark-haired like Darcy but dark-eyed, where she had inherited her mothers blue. Darcy desperately tried to shake off their hurtful commentary, slamming her car shut with more force than necessary without replying._

_She had hoped to be gone before they'd returned home from work. Had packed up whatever belongings she wanted to take and had kissed her beloved grandmother goodbye the day before. It was time, finally, and she could be free to fail or flourish without their constant interference. Moving quickly, climbing into the car and slamming the door behind her, Darcy took a few steadying breaths. Her car was always finicky, and taking the time to coax the slowly dying car to life would take more patience than she would have without calming down a little._ _Alice Lewis's face was stark and cold, suddenly pressed against the window of her car door. Darcy desperately tried to ignore her, and her father tight and disappointed just a few feet away. This was her one chance, if she backed out now she would never be free._

  
_Her mother's fist came down against the window, knocking incessantly, her other hand pulling at the locked door handle as if she could force Darcy from the car with the sheer effort of her anger. The knocking got louder and louder, her mother more angry and forceful with every passing second until Darcy was sure she could feel the vibrations right into her chest. They matched the hummingbird quick flutter of her fussy heart. Louder, louder, louder, and a frustrated scream built in her throat and threatened to spill into a mess._

Darcy woke with a start, but the knocking followed her from the dream into the waking world. Disorientated and panicked, Darcy tried to curl tight into a ball and protect herself from the familiarity of her mother's frequent controlling cruelty. Moving pulled the blankets tight against her body, though, and instead of having to hear her mother lecture her about her uselessness again, Darcy could finally take a breath. Calming, her mind pulled itself away from the memory wrapped up in a nightmare until finally she realized it was Jane banging on her bedroom door calling for her to 'hurry up already'. Their plane was leaving tonight and they had to double, triple, quadruple check everything was safe and ready to go hours before then. 

"Coming!" Darcy croaked out, just loud enough to satisfy Jane that she was actually away and not sleep talking, as she apparently often did. Once the knocking stopped and her friend moved away, Darcy took a second to just close her eyes and pull herself together in the here and now. Tried to reorient herself in the moment instead of six years ago in a town she hadn't seen since. While Darcy may still occasionally have contact with her parents, a request she couldn't ignore from her grandmother who was getting tired of dealing with them for her, their disappointment still lingered heavily in her dreams and fighting her way back to the life she had now sometimes took some time. 

With one final deep breath, Darcy swung herself carefully out of bed and steadied herself against the cool wall for a moment. Once the blank dizziness that usually happened as she first got up had passed, she made her way to the bathroom for the shower she had bailed on last night. Her meds sat on the edge of the sink, perfectly counted out to last until New York. Swallowing them down, Darcy shook herself out and started her usual morning routine. The sooner she was out there and ready to work, the less psycho-Jane she would have to deal with today. This time tomorrow she would be in a new place, with new people and hopefully a temptingly easy piece of stability.

  
Finally. 

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Darcy sighed, sealing the box with one more long strip of tape. The final one, done and handed off to a waiting Thor to load up into the van that had magically appeared an hour ago. Curtesy of their future landlord, by all accounts, but a miracle anyway. Neither Jane nor Darcy had thought to in the excitement, and Thor had never had to go through this rigmarole before. Some else with superior moving skills had made sure they would actually be able to move all the things they had so painstakingly packed away over the past few days. Sending a smile to Jane, who was now fussing at the van drivers rather than her friend or boyfriend, Darcy escaped to suck down a bottle of water and take her afternoon meds. Shaking off a threatening wave of dizziness that clouded her vision for a moment as she made her way to her now empty bedroom, Darcy surveyed the space around her. The big furniture and fittings would be staying, given that Jane's mother did need a functional home to come back to. Darcy eyed the very comfortable sofa with regret on her way past but was eternally thankful that they hadn't also had to wrestle with it. 

  
There was at most half an hour before Darcy would have to gather up the last of her things and her carry-on bag, but there was a familiar ache building in her calves from the weird circulation problem that had plagued her for years. Easing herself down, Darcy slipped off her shoes so she could rub as the painful purple skin of her lower legs and feet. With a sigh, Darcy resolved herself to this feeling only getting worse. As excited as she was, planes were absolutely Darcy's least favorite way to travel. Migraines, painful legs, and the terrible constant thump-thump-skip- _thumpthumpthump_ of her heart that were always side effects of air travel had halted any wanderlust she had maybe had when she was younger. Nothing to be done about it now, of course, unless she wanted to be stranded here in post-invasion London with nowhere to go and no money. With another, deeper sigh, Darcy slipped her shoes back on with a wince and made her way to the bathroom to brush her teeth and pee before they had to leave. There was nothing left in here to take, all of it shoved away last minute before their personal belongings had been loaded up. Now all she had to do was grab her to-go bag and they could be going. One final long look around the room Darcy had really come to appreciate over her time here, she whispered her goodbyes the way her grandmother had taught her to do for places that had been kind to her, and made her way to catch up with Jane and Thor. 

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The airport had been bustling as they'd pulled up towards it, and they had all shuddered at the thought of having to wade through all those people to check-in. Relief coursed through Darcy as the suit-clad driver who had swung by to pick them up in a Stark Industries SUV bypassed the usual terminal points and then marveled as they entered an area of the airport much quieter. There were smaller planes dotted around here and there when she looked out of the window, and they were dropped off at a small unassuming building plainly marked as 'Private'. Another suit-clad somebody appeared from the building and came to open their doors for them, standing by bemused as Thor wiggled his huge bulk out of the vehicle and two much smaller women slid out behind him. Door shut behind them, the car was driven away and they were escorted quickly into the building by the new suit guy, who had quietly introduced himself as Jeremy as he showed them inside. 

  
"The StarkJet is being prepared for take-off now, so please make yourselves comfortable here. There are drinks and refreshments in the kitchen to your right, and someone will be by shortly to check on your documentation and luggage. If you require anything else, please use the phone on the table, it will connect you to the staff member in an office nearby." With a polite smile and a small nod, Jeremy made himself scarce almost as quickly as he had appeared. Leaving herself and Jane shellshocked in the middle of the room, Thor dropped the bags he had grabbed by the giant cozy armchair near him and made his way off towards the kitchen.

Darcy and Jane remained where they were, looking around at the absurdity of it all until Jane, unable to contain it any longer, let out a quiet "what the fuck" under her breath. Darcy tried to hide her giggle behind her hand, but the oddness of the situation caught them both off guard, and soon they were helplessly giggling at each other, clinging to the other's arms for support as it took them over. They were finally winding down when Thor came back, sharing sized bag of Doritos in hand and a deeply confused look on his face as they took them in. Darcy could only imagine what they looked like, clutching at each other with red faces and laughter tears still in their eyes. One glance at each other again had she and Jane set off again until Thor, probably in concern for their health, took each of them by an arm and put them gently into the nearest seat. He continued to munch as they settled themselves, trying not to look at each other in case they set it off again. Thankfully, when the nice lady from passport control came to check their documents against the passenger manifest the only evidence of their insane giggle fit was flushed cheeks and Thor's eminently confused face. 

  
Passports checked and a can of coke in hand, it was only ten minutes before they were escorted back outside where a smallish plane emblazoned with 'Stark Industries' across its tail was waiting. Darcy gawped at it, amazed, but Jane seemed to be over the craziness of it all and Thor hadn't seemed like it was out of the ordinary at all. Jogging to catch up, Darcy made it to the bottom of the stairs that would lead them to the plane just as her travel companions were entering the cabin. Determined not to embarrass herself in front of all the trained flight people probably waiting for them inside, Darcy took in a deep calming breath and began her ascent with a smile on her face. 

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Two hours into the seven-hour flight, the throbbing behind Darcy's eyes began to match the harsh rapid flight of her heart. She curled into a ball on the comfortable chair she had chosen and tried to smother her head with the blanket she had been given. Her legs ached fiercely, and with each slight adjustment of the small plane her stomach tried to rebel against her.   
Quiet whispers began behind her but she could pay them no mind, and a second later a cool breeze began to mist over her as the light in the cabin was lowered and window coverings were drawn. Darcy could have cried as someone gently touched her hand and then pressed a cold pack into it, and with a quiet thanks she hoped whoever it was heard from beneath her blanket, she pressed it against the tight pressure growing in her eyes. 

  
An indeterminable time later Darcy woke from a sleep that had been surprisingly restorative. Someone had moved her a little as she slept, and her legs were now stretched out and slightly elevated in front of her. The cabin was still shrowded in dimness when she peaked out from behind the blanket still covering her. At some point, she must have let go of the compress, as it lay a little damp and skin warm against her chest. Wiggling to free herself, she took stock of herself. The movement had wigged her fragile heart rate a little, but she had worse when she first woke up most mornings. The ache in her legs had weakened down into a slow, deep niggle that was easier to ignore. 

  
A glance around the cabin showed Jane, tablet in hand but fast asleep herself with her head in Thor's lap. Thor himself was awake but had a contented look on his face as he glanced up to the sound of Darcy's quiet pleased hum. He smiled softly at her and informed her in a quiet whisper that they were two hours away from their destination. Mouthing a thank you in return, Darcy carefully began the process of standing up, dropping the cold pack on the chair behind her as she steadied herself against the back of the chair beside her. Slowly she made her way towards the bathroom at the back of the plane and was happy to accept the water a flight attendant handed her as she emerged fresher feeling and better than she had ever felt on a flight before. 

  
Content to let the quiet and peace of the flight continue, Darcy grabbed her iPod from her carry-on and tucked herself back under the blanket with her legs propped up in front of her again. It would be easy to get through the next two hours of this if it stayed as easy as this, which felt like a good sign for things to do. Content with things, Darcy let the world fade out around her again and began waiting to be back on home soil. 

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The bright New York sunshine took her by surprise as they deboarded at the private airport upstate, in London it would be approaching 11 in the evening, but it was just 6 in the afternoon here. Just the air was different than London, although she imagined that would change as they traveled closer to the city proper. Their luggage was being transported separately, so again all they had to do was climb into another waiting car and allow themselves to be ferried to their destination. 

  
Darcy had never been to New York and pressed her face excitedly against the windows as they came up towards the most obvious landscapes. Thor laughed as she pointed out the Empire State building with an excited grin on her face. Jane was absorbed in her tablet in front of her, but Darcy was too enamored with her new surroundings to care much about what she was up to right now.   
Soon the big, fancy famous landmarks were lost to an endless array of towering and shiny skyscrapers. Here and there were construction sites, clearly still recovering from the New York invasion a year earlier. It was hard to miss Stark Tower though, with its distinctive curve and excessively large 'A' balanced at its peak. Privately, Darcy thought it had been better with the original signage. Less abrasive. Less a reminder of what the city had suffered. If someone had left a sign in the ground from the smoking ruins of the pet shop she'd evacuated in New Mexico, Darcy would've been pissed.   
Not her circus, not her monkeys though. Given that said owner of tower and giant glowing reminder of a sign was about to give her a job and a place to live, it was probably best to not open her mouth about it. Anyway, last she'd read in the gossip mags, a large amount of the Avengers were currently living at the tower, and who was she to announce the stupidity of declaring your residence to the world and all its invaders like that. 

  
That thought sent a wave of anxiety through her, settling like a stone in the pit of her stomach. If the Avengers were in the tower, would she meet them? The Black Widow, deadly and beautiful and capable. Hawkeye, inspiration to millions of deaf people around the world and epic bow and arrow aficionado. The Hulk, who could be either the best scientist in the world or a giant green monster who could crush her with a finger. Captain freaking America, greatest hero who ever lived and a terrifyingly attractive man. And, fuck, Tony Stark. Last time she'd been near him he thought she was on drugs because she passed the fuck out right there in front of him. 

  
Darcy groaned, long and loud, before burying her head in her hands with despair. 

  
"Hey," Jane whispered low and gentle, "your migraine come back?" Darcy tilted her head and looked morosely at her friend. 

  
"Nah, just y'know, angsting over the fact that we're probably going to meet the most terrifying and beautiful people in the world at our new home and also," Darcy sat up straight, hands flapping in growing anxiety, "meet Tony Stark again after all that happened the last time I was anywhere near him." 

  
Thor laughed, loud and bright. Amusement tingled in the air around him and Darcy pouted dramatically as Jane shrugged her concerns off and went back to reading her screen. 

  
"You'll be fine, Lady Darcy. The Avengers may be mighty, but they are also good. You will like them, I think." Thor reached out to squeeze her shoulder reassuringly. Her amazement at the city diminishing under her new concerns, Darcy went back to staring out of the window. 

  
Liking them wasn't her concern. Them liking her, however, well that was another question altogether. 


	3. Arriving

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! 
> 
> I wanted to say a huge thank you to everyone who read the last chapter, and to those who helped me decide what to do about it. Obviously, I took the original down. A lot of you were right and I think I knew once I'd posted the note asking the question that I needed to take it down and work on it. You are all the best, thank you so much.
> 
> To those of you who enjoyed the original, I'm sorry! I love the extreme version of events in stories sometimes too but it's not the tale I'm telling here. I'm writing about finding yourself and your people in a world of superheroes and disabilities. About the human error, or success. Getting things wrong or right. It's a fine line to walk, the what you want versus the easier to write. I hope you enjoy this chapter, and my dedication to telling the story I set out to tell, but I would completely understand if your opinion had changed! 
> 
> And to those of you who were concerned about Jarvis, try not to worry too much! In the original, I hadn't gotten around to writing him in. A little different in this one, but still a lot of unanswered questions. Perhaps soon, we'll know what was going on there. 
> 
> Happy reading, everyone :)

Three days in and Darcy's concerns about meeting the Avengers had flown away in a wave of moving boxes and terrifying HR employees. A reasonably nice woman in a power suit had greeted them and handed over temporary passes upon their arrival, and they had been given a grace period of an evening to move their things into Thor's suite in the Tower, but a robotic voice by the name of Jarvis had woken them quite early the next day so they could _'attend to the requirements of being residents of Stark Tower'_. Darcy had groaned and bitched her way through her meds, a shower, and two cups of burning hot coffee before Jane had hurried her out the door, Thor's deep laughter a backing track to her early morning pain. Since then, Darcy had lost Jane to the set up of her new lab space and had herself been trapped in what felt like an endless stream of signing papers and attending the 'required' company courses on privacy, harassment, and evacuation procedures for a frankly terrifying amount of scenarios. The first two days Darcy had tried to read every line of every paper she had put her name on and then handed over to Jane, hopefully avoiding signing over her soul or a kidney. Maybe even her firstborn child. By the end of the second day, she'd had enough and figured that they could have whatever they wanted from her if only she could unclench her hand from its aching pen-hold claw.

  
Midway through day three, Darcy was released from the hell of HR and instead summoned down to the lab floors to help put together the last of Jane's space. Large, with an entire wall of windows facing the hallway and shiny shiny equipment that hadn't yet been taped and molded together the way Jane's stuff usually ended up. Darcy almost couldn't find her friend amongst the glittering reflection of literally everything, so different than what she was used to. In hopes that Jane wasn't lost to whatever Science!God had provided this bounty, Darcy called out an extra loud and echoing 'Marco', then followed with relief the distracted 'Polo' from the opposite end of the lab. Jane was distracted, staring intently at a screen filled with lines of colors Darcy couldn't even begin to parse out over her shoulder. 

  
"Trying to color co-ordinate your and Thor's wardrobe there, Boss-lady?" Darcy rested her chin on Jane's bony shoulder, trying to figure out if there was a key to explain what madness Jane was staring so menacingly at. Her friend shrugged her off with an irritated twitch of her shoulder, making Darcy snort and back up a step. 

  
"Stark dumped a bunch of undecipherable readings onto the server from the New York wormhole with absolutely no way to understand what any of it means, and he isn't back in the tower until the start of next week."

  
"Looks to me like the old Microsoft music graphics made sweet, sweet love with one of those circle drawing compass thingys and this is their baby." 

  
Although to Darcy, the news that Tony Stark was out of the country sounded like a blessing in disguise. The anxiety she'd shoved down deep when she'd encountered the seriousness of Escape Procedures page 1 of 63, about seeing the Avengers and Tony Stark in particular, had threatened to flare back up with a vengeance once she'd been cut loose for the day. Jane grumbled though and didn't even grace Darcy with her usual snort or look of derision for the joke. Instead jabbing irritably at the screen as if it would reveal all the secrets hidden away inside the funky graph lines in front of them. 

  
Clearly, it was building up to a DefCon 1 situation, as her screen jabbing became keyboard smashing and the Frustrated Furrow of Doom appeared between her eyebrows. This was becoming a situation Darcy was going to have to interfere with, and quickly. Pasting a delighted grin on her face, Darcy began poking Jane in the ticklish spot under her ribs until she turned her frustrated face into an annoyed face in Darcy's direction. 

  
"Hey, yay! So that means there's nothing else for us to do! We are free and easy for at least the rest of today, and man. I am, for one, super glad for that. Sorta feels like we've been yanked into an alternative reality where everyone is kinda smarmy and there has been no stopping for three days. How 'bout we bail on any of this, pop open the bottle of fancy tequila I have tucked away from the days of yonder past, otherwise known as New Mexico, and I can tell you about the faces on the science type people in the seminars when I told them I was a poli-sci grad working with the greatest love of the God of Thunder?" Darcy wiggled her eyebrow suggestively, nudging Jane gently in the arm until a reluctant twitch of her mouth turned into an exasperated laugh. Success! 

  
"Yeah. Yeah, sure. That actually sounds great. Let me just," Jane sighed, waved her hand in the general direction of the screen of frustration, "and I'll meet you up there in ten." Darcy made finger guns in the direction of her friend, grinning at Jane's snort of amusement, and walked backward until she reached the wall of endless windows. With one last sigh at the back of her boss, Darcy turned about and set off for their rooms. Crisis averted. 

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Darcy was grateful she had cut herself off a few shots in and swapped out to nurse a beer for the rest of the night. Jane had been a sloppy, giggling mess by the time Thor returned to their quarters and Darcy was happy to have handed her boss off. Not so pleased when the close quarters meant she could hear every second of their 'activities' afterward. She'd finally gotten to sleep in the so-late-it's-early hours of the day, and woken surprisingly fresh as a daisy mid-morning. Bathing in the sweet joy of knowing there was no more paperwork to sign, and that Jane would be asleep for the rest of the day and awake late afternoon with a killer hangover, Darcy luxuriated in the ability to do whatever the hell she wanted. A long bath while her meds kicked in, comfy clothes instead of the work skirt and shirt combo she'd been forced to endure over the past few days. She hit a snag when she entered into their shared space and found the kitchen a nightmare of bottles, glasses, snack foods spilled in Jane's drunken antics. Refusing to let the messy obstacle between her and coffee ruin her good mood, Darcy squared her shoulders, popped in her headphones, and decided to finally brave the floor's communal kitchen. It had been pointed out the day they moved in but first her worry over meeting actual-facts Superheros, and then lack of time had prevented her from checking it out yet. 

  
It had been quite a long time since Darcy had woken up feeling this good, she ruminated on the good luck of a good day falling today of all days as she hopped and shimmied her way to the kitchen. The fun nostalgia of her teenage alt-playlist carrying her along and loud enough to rattle her teeth a little. The corny lyrics of 3oh!3's DONTTRUSTME were just starting up when she finally found the kitchen she was looking for. A wide-open space occupied on one side by the most beautiful kitchen Darcy had ever seen, the other a social space with seating and entertaining options. Promising herself she would check out the finer details of what looked like a killer gaming system once she had sweet caffeinated goodness, Darcy followed the directions of the song and talked with her hips right in the direction of what looked like a high tech coffee system sitting shiny and enticing on the counter. It took some fiddling, interrupted as Darcy sang along enthusiastically, but finally, she wrestled the machine into providing the good stuff. Setting it to make the strongest cup it could, she skipped over the next song and settled on some All-American Rejects before continuing to boogie her way around the space. Digging into cabinets until she found the biggest mug they had, through drawers and the pantry for sugar or sweetener, and finally humming to herself in front of the giant refrigerator as she contemplated the frankly insane amount of flavored creamer in front of her. Just as she was about to reach for the delicious-sounding vanilla oat, something changed. Whether it was intuition or a shadow moving. Maybe a sound, making its way over the deafening of her music. 

  
Darcy twisted quickly, earphones yanked loose in the move, just as a hand was about to come into contact firmly with her shoulder. Ducking down small the way her grandmother's fierce little old lady friends had taught her, Darcy tried to sidestep and swing herself out of the way of the person reaching for her. Instead of managing to evade the person just redirected, grabbing firmly on her wrist instead in a nauseating way until Darcy had to force herself still and grit her teeth to stop the scream starting to make its way up her throat. Pulled in close all Darcy could see was the very large chest and a pale jaw of the man who had hold of her.

  
"Who are you and why are you here?" Firmly and aggressively the man held her. Darcy took a deep breath in to swallow down the urge to vomit as the hand on her wrist tightened just a fraction. 

  
"Live- I live here!" Darcy whined out. His grip was strong enough to feel like shackles, unbreakable. All of her focus was narrowing down to the way it felt like he was grounding the small bones in her arm and hand against each other. This time, when the hand tightened again in response to her answer, Darcy couldn't quite swallow away the noise of pain she made this time. 

  
"Lie," he growled out, twisting the hold until she was forced to turn away and he could hold it behind her instead, "You do not live here. You have one more chance to tell me the truth."

  
_Breathe, oh fuck, just keep breathing._ Head swimming and trying to cling onto reasonable thought with everything she had Darcy gasped air in as slowly as she could.   
"Not lying! I work-" the hand tightened again and Darcy was forced to scream. Instead of finishing her first thought, she did the only thing she could think of, the one thing the nice lady who had given them their access badges on the first night had told her to do if there was any trouble. 

"JARVIS!" Darcy screamed out, desperate.

  
"Miss Le- Captain Rogers! Release Miss Lewis right this instant!" Maybe it was in her head, dizzy and desperate, but it sounded like the robotic voice she had been introduced to had developed a sudden and startling range of firm emotions. Not much attention could be paid though, as the grip on her didn't release. Lightheaded, Darcy once again swallowed down the nausea and tried desperately to focus on one spot ahead of her so she could stay upright. 

  
"Release Miss Lewis at once, Captain. She is a resident of Sir and a guest of Thor. Release her right now or I shall be forced to intervene." 

  
Darcy collapsed to her knees as the harsh, unrelenting pressure finally released. The man holding her stepped away until his shadow no longer towered over. She didn't know how long she knelt there, arm held useless at her side before Jarvis's voice finally cut through her panic and pain. 

  
"In, again, Miss Lewis." Darcy followed with a gasp of air, held it wholly in her chest the way she had been taught as a teenager. 

  
"Out." Nodding her head on the exhale, Darcy fell out of her kneel and onto her butt solidly and thanked Thor for the steady ground beneath her. 

  
"Miss Foster and Thor are on their way now to you, Miss Lewis. Do you require medical attention?" Glancing down at her wrist, Darcy frowned at the red-purple fingerprints and the ring of pressure bruises forming from under her thumb and down beyond her wrist bone. She attempted to twist it, gently. 

  
Fuck. _**Fuck**_. That hurt, but she could get a kind of semi-circle movement going so she shook her head a negative and instead went back to breathing evenly and trying not to cry. Darcy was on her tenth _inhale-hold-exhale_ when the comforting and familiar weight of her friend and boss knelt next to her. Jane looked her over critically, eyes turning from familiar chocolate brown to furious black as they settled on her wrist and then back again once Darcy raised her head enough to look Jane in the eye.

  
"Oh Darce," Jane sighed with a wince, "let's get you out of here, huh?" Darcy nodded with quiet relief. The familiar voice of Thor was somewhere over to the left of them loudly, quietly responded to by the voice that just a minute ago had demanded to know who she was. Darcy wanted away from that as soon as possible. Jane helped her shimmy backward until the counter was behind her and Darcy could use its support and her one good arm to lever herself up. Wobbling, her heart beating so fast she thought it might just explode out of her chest, Jane helped her stumble her way towards the exit. 

  
"Miss Lewis-" Darcy froze at the voice, closer than she wanted it. Slowly she turned around, Jane holding lightly onto her still. He was halfway across the room, Thor an imposing yet protective line in front of him. She looked first at his hands. Innocuous looking now that they were no longer trying to break her bones. Then up, through broad shoulders and the firm jawline she'd seen before he had twisted her around. Up again. Until she was looking in the eyes of Captain America himself. 

  
Darcy stared at him, hard for a moment, without replying. He didn't say anything else and instead stood there looking lost and somehow small behind his teammate.

  
Jane tugged gently on her arm, and Darcy allowed herself to be led away. 

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Hey, Jarvis?" Darcy was swaddled up on the sofa and resting a brilliantly cold gel pack over her wrist when the thought came to her. "Why didn't you interfere until I shouted for you? I distinctly remember the steely gaze of the woman who told me you had eyes and ears everywhere in the Tower."

  
In the background, on the edge periphery of her hearing, there was a hum. Darcy hadn't realized it before, but it was familiar to the noise of heating kicking in through pipes in old homes. Familiar, comforting, but faintly noticeable if you knew what you were listening for. 

  
She believed it meant that Jarvis was listening, maybe thinking. His voice had changed now. Robotic from introduction, he was now distinctly British and had a somewhat terrifying inflection of emotion for someone she didn't think was a human being in truth. They'd talked backward and forwards for an hour since she'd been left to rest, and Darcy was only just starting to get used to the changes in him. 

  
"Sir and I are currently attempting to uncover the reason I was not active in that area at the time of the incident with Captain Rogers, Miss Lewis. Once Sir is back in residence, I am sure we will have more concrete answers for you. Once again, I am incredibly sorry to not have interfered earlier." Darcy sighed but waved him off anyway.

  
"Nah, you came through in the end and that's what matters. But... You- You have eyes on right now, right? Like if someone were to creep up you'd be able to tell me and them so that... Well, y'know." Immediately this time, without the hum of his thinking, Jarvis answered.

  
"I- as you say- have 'eyes on', Miss Lewis. I shall not allow anyone to approach you without prior warning." Relief. Sweet relief. Darcy hummed a tired reply in thanks and allowed her eyes to finally slip shut. The painkillers Jane had dumped on her earlier before she'd gone to find Thor had been threatening to take her under for a while now. Darcy hadn't been able to let them until she'd built up the courage to reassure her safety. 

  
"Wake me when Janey and Thor are on their way back, J." A mumble, halfway to rest already. There was a low beep of Jarvis confirming, wordless but sounding like a promise anyway, and Darcy let herself be dragged down into sleep. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There will be a perspective change next chapter!


End file.
